Monday Hopefulness

I am feeling a stirring of hope. Perhaps it’s embarrassing to admit, but I’ll do it anyway: My life has been entirely absorbed by the tv shows: Buffy the Vampire Slayer and Angel. Every single night (with maybe one tiny handful of exceptions), I have watched at least two but sometimes four or five episodes of the show after the girls have gone to bed. That puts me falling to sleep sometime after midnight routinely. So I ask you, why have I been so tired? More importantly, why do I do this to myself? If I am lucky enough to have a good friend in Adam to get me these shows, why must I rush through them so fervently?

Addiction. Addiction to following out a story line, and knowing what’s ‘going to happen’, and well….ignoring the rest of my life! Ha! While I am filled with some sadness over the ending of my beloved shows (we finished Buffy over the weekend and have started the last season of Angel), I am remarkably excited to think about having a life again! Thinking! Making! Saying! Doing so many things that I have neglected for the last errr….three months or so??

It embarrasses me how much my mind has atrophied, and really, how much my momentum to do things has fizzled. I will find it though, whether it takes a pickax, a compass, and night goggles to find* it. I am sure my go-get’em attitude is largely helped by my “mouth cancer” as I’ve been calling it improving. It has been a month of pain! A MONTH! More importantly, it has been a month of not talking (well at least not much), so in case you were wondering why it’s been so quiet around here, try starting with Wallflower Gabrielle, who is now becoming some strange psychedelic-motion-wallpaper-coming-to-life thing, so yeah…weird!

Anyway, I am quite taken with my camera lately. Taking random pictures of things has become my new listmaking love. So if you keep getting this feeling like you want to tell me I’m not talented, cool, I get it, I know it too, but I do have eyes for capturing things that tickle my heart so --- deal.

P.S. Playing Life at the coast with your lovely friend Jacob, and a tall glass of Kailua (well homemade Kailua fabulousness) and cream = a good time!

*Quote from L.A. Story